disowns:

when you see a big spider on your desk 

image

(Source: disowns, via baracknobama)

parkingstrange:

I was laying naked in my bed earlier and my brother and sister got home from school so they just walked right in and saw me there, laying naked. My sister looked me right in the eye and said “can you park that somewhere else?” she saw the chance and she fucking took it.

(via yelled)

meanplastic:

'hey did you do your homework?'

https://31.media.tumblr.com/0df5eeb02f4e73b562976df58f9fb90b/tumblr_n0m0brrdPH1tro8coo1_250.gif

(via baracknobama)

pissedachios:

pissedachios:

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?

oh sheet

(via encourage)

rosaparking:

babies need to shut the fuck up and get a job

(via distraction)

tonyabbot:

when bad things happens to the person you hate

image

(via contort)

actuallycrying:

LET’S TRASH THIS PLACE

image

(via trust)

flatsound:

i wanna feel how dogs feel when you let them go in a big field 

(via asvprock)